The lesson I Learned Today:
The Relationship between student and teacher is equivalent to pond scum and an olympic gymnast who doesn't even go near ponds.
How I Learned This Lesson:
Silly me,I decided I would write my essay and in some miraculous feat it would be deemed acceptable by the academic world…I was sadly mistaken.
See I came from a world where teachers brought students pizza, and donuts, and would tell hilarious jokes involving men and kilts. They graded on effort not ability, and I welcomed this system like ice cream after a 5 mile run. I didn’t realize that at evil places (BYU!) teachers wanted you to put in a good 20 hours per paper even though you only allotted 4 hours to the project.
So I took my paper in to discuss it with my teacher on Wednesday(a whole two days before it was due)and as I walked into her office I was immediately assaulted by a wall of books. Yes, I realize I also own a ton of books, but the main difference between our collections is mine consists of happy go lucky frivolous reads filled with lolly pops and rainbows………and each of hers weighed more than my head with titles I couldn't pronounce.
My palms began to moisten when I handed her my paper and saw the plaque containing the words Doctorate and NOTRE DAME!
(The Plaque was written in Latin, WHAT. I have to say I like my Latin like I like my zombies, to stay dead.)
Then she started reading it while I started to sweat profusely. And as my words and opinions were shredded and demolished before my eyes I slowly started to shrink in stature until I was drowning in the puddles created by my very own tears and perspiration.
When she was done I quickly gathered up the pieces of my ill-conceived thoughts and ideas and removed my moisture sodden pride from her disappointed eyes, apologizing for ever subjecting her to the excruciating experience that was reading my paper.
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