Just a Taste of Luxury

I have always thought the day I make it in the world will be defined by how often I can eat bacon.  It won’t be the day I am dripping in diamonds, or organizing my Beauty and the Beast library, or jetting all of the world just to end up in my favorite villa in Tuscany. No the day that I am filthy rich will be the day that I can walk into my kitchen and hear this:

Armand {my personal chief}: Well, good morning Mrs. Marsden, would you like some bacon with your stuffed French toast.

Or

Armand: Mrs. Marsden, would you like a midnight bacon snack for you and James.

Or even

Armand: Mrs. Marsden, would you care for a bacon syrup smoothie for your jet to Italy?

As you can see, I am overly fond of bacon. So when Jill heard that Burger King just came out with a bacon sundae, I was the first person she texted {I sincerely hope this is true}

Unfortunately, I got this text at 11:00 in the morning and I was still at work {wa wa wa…}. And for some reason, it’s not ok to abandon a student mid-tutoring appointment to go try out a new treat filled with bacony delight…completely unfair if you ask me.

But fortunately, I work with my kind of people. The kind of people that would love to try out a bacon blend filled with childhood curiosity. So I sent them the news release premiering Burger King’s Bacon Sundae – A.K.A. the best decision since they started selling Hershey’s Chocolate Cream Pies - and we immediately formed a plan.

While I stayed to tutor little Timmy in adverbs, the boys went to grab the treat for all of us.

There were four adventurous souls that tried this tasty concoction and it got a unanimous mmm mmm mmm mmm.

It was smooth and creamy with light bacon flecks of salty pleasure woven throughout and laced with velvety caramel and rich chocolate. Then out of nowhere comes this large chunk of bacon that stands the length of the container. A tempting piece that dares you to try and save it till the last, but few fight the allure for long.

All in all, we loved it.

Anyhoo, now I know where to get a taste of the rich life I can look forward to enjoying once James and I get married.

P.S. Kel read this post and just had to try it for herself. I do believe my little bacon discovery knocked her sandals right off. Here are some pictures from our adventure.

Just look at my little face, only money could buy that kind of happiness....and that's why I need lots of it.

Park City and The Elusive Outlets: A Comedy

Last week, mom came down to help take care of little Boyd and the twiners while Candace finished up her undergraduate {congrats Candace!!}. This was wonderful news for me because - other than being able to spend time with my mom - I got to go to the eye doctor! A visit that has been in the making for three years.

See for the past couple of years my eyes have started to burn and itch uncontrollably. This misery also has an obnoxious side affect: my eyes are consistently red. A fact that makes it hard to maintain relationships with people who don't like hanging out with a red-eyed freak and ultimately results in my overuse of red eye drops: not an ideal fix.

Anyhoo, I went. I can see. I have friends once again.

But that is hardly the point to this story. Mom and I did more than just visit the Eye doctor {not that that isn't fun enough for both of us...}. On Saturday, I wanted to plan a fun little trip and I settled on going to Park City. A resort town known for its mining origins, fancy stores, skiing enthusiasts, and overall cuteness. And as a special treat we would go to the outlet mall rumored to be "right by" Park city.

The smart idea would have been to get directions beforehand so we wouldn't spend hours yelling at my mom's gps...but I thought modern technology would never lead us astray {HA!}. We found Park City main street just fine and we spent most of the day walking up and down visiting the little overpriced shops.

Our personal favorite was the Rocky Mountain Chocolate store. Since this was the last stop on our little tour of the town, we thought we would ask the store workers if they could direct us to the outlet mall. This is when we met Little Billy, a nervous little fellow estimated to be about 16, and Hans Hans, a German {this may or may not be their actual names}. The interaction went as follows:

Me: {directed towards little Billy} Could you tell us how to get to the outlet mall?

Little Billy: {whispering} Um...well, there's this street...mmmmm..and you go on it and then, then there's Walmart... um... gulp so, ya Walmart.

Me: {My thoughts: ok little Billy, let's focus} I don't know where Walmart is, sorry, could you explain it again?

Little Billy: {still whispering} um...ok...um, 7 Eleven on right side....go go past...and um gulp...

And this is where Hans Hans came in...

Hans Hans: Outlet Store ya? Youa go downa the road and it'sa at the end. Passa McDonalds and Walmart. {clearly my ability to write accents is atrocious, but I do the best I can}.

Me: Um, is there any way we can get street names?

That seemed to really confuse them so Mom focused on getting Little Billy to talk and I stuck with Hans Hans. For about 5 minutes I nodded, mentally trying out a German accent, while mom had little success with Billy.

We left the store 5 minutes late at a complete loss on how to get to these elusive stores, but we had toffee so all was right with the world.

I then texted my friend Jordan for directions. She told us to go North. We didn't know where North was. So we turned to Mom's "smart phone".

This trickster device found great pleasure in directing us away from main street and then forcing us to take sharp turns and random one way streets up the mountain and back down to main street. I threatened to toss the little cad if mom didn't turn it off. 

I called Jordan again. She gave us specific street by street directions. Bless her. Apparently the Rocky Mountain boys were right about it being near McDonalds, 7 Eleven, and Walmart. But they all left out one important detail: you must turn before you pass McDonald's. Failure to do so results in entering the freeway, freaking out, and being forced into driving 10 miles back to Park City.

I think our time in the car was divided between angry rants and uncontrollable giggling.

I say with great delight that we found the outlets.

Our little trip may have caused some unpleasant outbursts {gps and I still haven’t reconciled} but overall it was a wonderful day and I have cute discounted Banana Republic skirt to prove it.