Things That Make Me Giggle:

1. A guy riding on a scooter

2. Two guys riding on a scooter

3. Floral hair arrangements (yes, a flower can look cute in your hair girls, but lets not get carried away. A garden noggin is not a fashion statement!)

4. The big words the other english students while I contemplate buying a dictionary.

5. Single adult dances *snort*

6. Guys comments on my walking speed. (it's not my fault my femur bone is freakishly long, it simple gets me to places faster.)

7. Kyle yelling, "you're not black," as a walk by with my headphones in.

8. Having a 20 lb bag of ketchup spill on me and the MTC carpet. (this moment fully captured me in all my glory)

9. Guys in Skinny jeans and v-neck shirts. Why? because it's gross and, frankly, a little gay.

10. Getting text messages from my brother Adam saying, "have you got any yet?" Well Adam, have fun explaining to mom what that sentence means.

Three Cheers for Minimum Wage Jobs!!!

I arrived early to BYU in hopes that I would find a quality job. My hopes even raised me into believing I could get a job at the coveted Harold B. Lee Library!

But alas this is me we are talking about and my life has a way of taking the more hilarious route.

Instead I found a job at the MTC. Do not let the glamour of the MTC name confuse you, I do not work WITH the missionaries, I work FOR the missionaries. My job title, in all its glory, is The Dish Room Worker. This job includes scraping food off dishes, turning over cups, and if I’m lucky, unloading the dishes of 2700 hungry missionaries. And in-between all of the loading and unloading I get to wade through the hot sticky air, permeated with the smell of a thousand flavors.

I’m a lucky girl, right?

Do you want to hear the worst part….the uniform includes a hat. I don’t know if you’ve seen curly hair under a hat, but it closely resembles a small woodland creature caught in a very aggressive trap. Once again I tend to make things sound worse than they are. The dish room is an okay profession, even honorable if you throw in the whole, “I’m serving the missionaries,” so I really shouldn’t complain...but I probably still will.

Now on to the next job. On weekends I get to work 6 hour shifts for the even staff at the BYU football games. This job includes directing people to their seats, enforcing crowd control, and telling guests not to stand by the railings and having them yell at me (this actually happened, this mean old man got irrationally mad at me and bawled me out, but I have to say he did come later and apologized). You may wonder if I get to actually watch a BYU football game, well the pamphlet says no, but I’m known for my rebellious streak so I do it anyways, I just have to be very very sneaky like ( Most of you know authority frightens me, but I’ve come up with a most brilliant plan to openly boast that I’m a rebellion in hopes that it one day might be true). I actually don’t mind this job, and even though I have to sport yet another atrocious hat, I do get into the games for free ;)

Lora's less dramatic take on BYU!

I realize that I have not blogged in a long time and there is a really great reason for that.

I have no time.

So I’m going to start from the beginning:

Once upon a time my mother left me alone at BYU surrounded by sketchy RM’s, unknown roomies, and sadistic teachers and ever since I have been avoiding tempting tall buildings and sharp objects.

Bahahahahahaha Okay now I’m being dramatic, so far my experiences have been truly awesome!

I got here a week early to search for a job and I have found two so that’s great (no worries I’ll have a separate post dedicated to these quality ‘jobs’ I’ve picked up)

First things first, my house is amazing! It consists of two stories filled with nooks (a breakfast nook and a music nook), kitchens, a dinning room, a living room, and of course 6 bedrooms. My bedroom is on the ground floor and is the best room ever. I’m sharing it with Anna banana and we have it decorated to the t (not to brag, but we are amazing decorators). Our other 8 roommates are wonderful and we have already had the best time together (I will put up pictures of our cute house and the lovely girls that dwell in it later).

My first week was nutso and all my classes are proving to be way intense, but I have to say I’m ready for the challenge and I love how much I’m learning. Also my writing skills, spellings skills, and grammar skills need some heavy duty work so hopefully these classes whip me into shape to become the greatest book agent/librarian/teacher/publisher/editor EVER! (okay so I haven’t really completely decided on what I’m going to do, but in my defense I have a lot of research and chocolate to pound before I can choose my entire life’s future).

Did you know that in some schools the class rooms are filled with students who actually want to learn instead of take naps and copy my homework? Neither did I, but apparently BYU is where all of these quality students have been hiding. It’s very unsettling.

Enough with the boring stuff like workload, due dates, psycho teachers, blah blah blah and on to the good stuff.

Social life! (You know, I’m beginning to think that FHE, break-the-fasts, ward pray, and opening socials are all a ploy to get us single folk married...nah I’m probably just being paranoid)

This weekend was filled with parties, planet earth, break the fasts (did you know the ward feeds you unlimited pie’s and burgers for free just for fasting? Fantastico!!!), midnight ice-cream runs, movies, ect.

Needless to say I did not do any homework till Monday and I have to say Monday was the longest day ever. Six hours of homework does a lot of damage to curly haired girls such as I.

HELLo BYU!

I figured since I ended EAC with a quote it was appropriate to begin my BYU experience with yet another one.

"I believe I am in Hell, therefore I am." -Arthur Rimbaud

Europe

From May 28 till June 11 I will be traveling in Europe!!! If you want to feel extremely jealous you can read all about it on our blog

http://travelingtarts.blogspot.com/

Ciao for now

Packing Up

This is really weird, but moments of my life remind me of my favorite book quotes and today is not an exception. While I pack for my brief sojourn home, before the reality of BYU hits me, I think of something Daphne Du Maurier wrote.

“Packing up. The nagging worry of departure. Lost keys, unwritten labels. Tissue paper lying on the floor. I hate it all. Even now when I have done so much of it, when I live, as the saying goes, in my boxes…..I am aware of sadness of a sense of loss. Here, I say, we have lived, we have been happy. This has been ours, however brief the time. Though two nights only have been spent beneath a roof, yet we leave something of ourselves behind. Nothing material, not a hairpin on a dressing table, not an empty bottle of aspirin tablets, not a handkerchief beneath the pillow, but something indefinable, a moment of our lives, a thought, a mood.”

“This house sheltered us, we spoke, we loved within those walls. That was yesterday. Today we pass on, we see it no more, and we are different, changed in some infinitesimal way. We can never be quite the same again.”

For the past few weeks I have been at a loss for words to describe what I feel about leaving EAC and this quote typifies my very thoughts. I am packing up memories, laughs, friendships, moments that have changed my life and I can’t adequately describe how sad this makes me. EAC was one of the best decisions of my life and I am grateful for all of the amazing people I have met and the wonderful times we have had here. So thank you EAC you gave me two wildly marvelous years.

Why am I RISKing my grades?

In college there is a wide gap between your ambitious daily goals and your what you actually accomplish during the day.

For instance I needed to study for my Tuesday finals. So I made up a strict schedule of study times in order for me to ace them all. But then life got in the way and laughed hysterically at all my silly goals. Here is a chart of what I wanted to happen and what actually happened this last Monday.

Goal: wake up at 9, get ready, and start working on your outline for your final essay in Eng 218.

Reality: woke up at 11

Goal: Eat a healthy meal to ready your mind for finals.

Reality: Went to KFC with friends then walked to Wal-Mart for my 4th Ben and Jerry’s this week.

Goal: Spend afternoon working on outline for Eng 222

Reality: Engaged in epic battle of Risk with friends (Taylor, Brandon, Megan, Cheston, Nick, Marisa, Kelly)

Goal: Study for Biology final until the Closing Social begins

Reality: I took a nap (in my defense Risk took a lot out of me and I needed to sleep off my Ben and Jerry’s hangover)

Goal: After social go home and get to bed early

Reality: Stayed up till midnight and watched a movie with my friends.

In conclusion, I made some pretty bad life choices…..and will probably continue making them since we haven’t finished Risk yet and Taylor and I are owning!

Why Me?!

Yesterday my cute little Indian physics teacher came up and asked me if I would write a few sentences about how much I love physics. The only catch is I loath physics with every fiber of my being. I would rather be skinned alive and rolled in salt than have to suffer through that class again. But how in the world do you tell that to the sweetest lady ever…..the thing is you don’t, you lie.

Now I have a moral dilemma, what should I say?! So here are a few options and I need your help decided what will be appropriate.

Lie. “Every day I wake up and smile because that is the day I get to journey into the wonderful world of physics. I let out a giddy sigh and thank the heavens BYU forced me to take this class. I skip to the classroom and feel like my soul is finally whole because physics completes me.”

The nifty use of a double meaning: “I came, I learned, I loved”. (I came…with much resistance, I learned…..that I hate football players, I loved….. when a football player almost electrocuted himself in lab)

Truth: “Being in your class is like having my nails slowly ripped out of my fingers. It takes a lot of time, there are tears involved, and there will definitely be scars left over.”

I am facing a serious catch-22!

Introducing the Gila Valley Temple!!!

I realized that I mostly blog about things that annoy me, people that annoy me, and situations that annoy me ha ha so I'm going to blog about the most amazing thing going on at EAC right now............THE TEMPLE OPEN HOUSE!!!

A new and beautiful temple has just been built in the Gila Valley! It is such an exciting time to be at EAC!

On monday I was able to go through with some of my community mates who were non LDS. It was such a wonderful experience and I loved being able to share it with people from a different religion. I have to admit I started tearing up during the introduction video ha ha the whole time I just kept saying, "be cool Lora, be cool, Patterson's don't cry ha ha."

The inside was beyond words, each room was just so amazing. If you haven't been to the open house you need to go immediately. I plan on going as many times as I can.

Run and hide scumbags, run and hide!

Many forms of torture have been used over the centuries to inflict pain on others for the sadistic gratification of the torturer. The most effected device of torture was discovered and executed by our very own Residents Towers (congrats guys). Towers have begun to turn the heaters on during the night. By doing these we are unable to go to sleep or stay asleep. These people are sick and twisted!

Every night I know that I will be woken up at an indecent hour perspiring (a lady never sweats) to death. I will than be so irate that I can no longer go to bed. I will proceed to jump into a cold shower fully clothed and sink into my wet bed with a sweet sigh of relief.

I might not have the best sleeping habits, oh what am I saying I hardly get any sleep anymore, but the precious hours that my head gets to spend on my feather pillow are few and far between and the scumbags that are turning the heat on will pay, maybe not today or tomorrow, but someday they will PAY!